Saturday, 18 February 2012

A harsh mistress

This blog post is a confession. I am having an affair.
It started towards the end of last year - a few days before the full moon in December. I’d meet with her every Saturday, at a public park near a restaurant beside the Brisbane river. 
Yes we do it in the park, in New Farm, an inner city suburb of Brisbane. 
We’d conduct our liaisons in the morning, awkward but manageable. I like to sleep in on  Saturdays, but I gave up that luxury for pleasure (some might say pain). We’d be together for about an hour, me and my mistress, sometimes more sometimes less.
For our trysts, she wants me to be there early. She wants to ‘brief’ me on how to do things - where to start, the ways to go and turn, and even how to finish. My mistress is very demanding. She also wants some foreplay beforehand, ‘warmups’ she calls it. Recently, seeing how long I took, she suggested I should start behind, from the rear, so that I don’t get distracted.
The heat of our passionate meetings lasts long enough: 30 minutes or thereabouts. I do want it to be ‘quicker’ but cannot. Mind you it’s not for lack of trying.
We do it next to the bikes, on the boardwalks and on the paths, under the trees and on the grass. 
Most times I get hot and sweaty. Oh it gets wet and slippery too – in the rain. Almost always I’m gasping and panting. She likes for me to ‘sprint’ at the finish- but to shoot down the right chute –'yes there' she directs, between the ‘cones’ she says.
This affair is still blossoming, it’s only been three months. I hope it continues for a bit longer. I know that I’ll be there rain or shine, and come hell or high water- as long as the park’s not in flood. So far I’ve only missed one rendezvous. Truth was I had to be with another mistress. This other mistress liked to do it on the trails. This ‘trails’ affair early this month was up a glorious mount – in Mt Glorious. I made up all sorts of excuses for this one missed park run-d-vogue.
Some days though I'd have to make a choice. Do it in the park, or in the trails, or on the roads, out on the boring bitumen? Why do I have to choose?
I’ll stick with this mistress I think. There’s nothing like doing it in the park.
Sometimes we do it in sight of kayakers.
Down by the banks of the Brisbane... in New Farm park.

I thought of writing about this event just after the Mount Glorious trails affair two weeks ago, about the time of the full moon. Yes, it must have been the full moon!
Ahh the moon, now there’s another harsh mistress...
I met these guys after an encounter with the mistress. They forgot to slop on sunscreen and were caught red-faced, routed and rooted - beetrooted by that other harsh mistress - the sun. I am getting outed now too. Maybe I should go on that out-of-town work stint. Work? Ahhh yet another mistress... And work dictates that I should go out-of-town. Did I say I hate dictators too?
Shooting down the right chute at the finish – on the inside of the orange cones.
The Powerhouse, home of the mistress, the New Farm 5km Saturday parkrun.


  1. Classic blogging, can i meet your mistress too!

  2. Hello there Grant, we can share ;-). But your mistress is waiting, saying: 'love, mount __'- what's her name again? you had better be ready. see you back in a couple of weeks...

  3. Very good writing Martin. You are a natural-born writer. Like you said, Running is better than sex. My best regards.

  4. Mr Joe, you're very kind thanks. Your running mileage is quite impressive too. You downplay it, but I can't even do half of what you run each week or month. Let's keep on running, for 'running' is just another word for nothing left to lose - maybe except for sex, but why waste your energy on that eh?


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